Pillow Talk #13

Happy Sunday!

I'm getting back on track when it comes to blogging and I've got so, so many posts/books/music I want to share with you!

In case you're new here, my Pillow Talk posts are a weekly (most of the time) round-up where I'll give a mini life update of what I've been up to that week, along with sharing wonderful content that I've been exploring. Whether it be blog posts, videos, podcasts, music, you name it, if I've enjoyed it I'll be mentioning it here!
To consider

Why Minimalism Is Essential To Doing More Of What Matters - Break The Twitch

Over the last few weeks, I've taken a real dislike to clutter. Although you might not believe it considering how many water bottles and receipts there are in my car, not forgetting the never-ending supply of clothes tags lying around my room, I'm trying to change. I'm desperately trying to simplify things and if I don't need it, or don't love it, to get rid of it! Part of this mindset came from this post on minimalism by Anthony Ongaro, who explains that sure, minimalism won't solve your problems, but it might help clear your mind a little! I also listened to this episode of The Debrief Podcast on How To Become A Tidy Person. It's old now but a) funny, and b) very helpful! More on podcasts later!

The Debate To Divide A Nation: Should We Keep Read Receipts On?

I'm a regular reader of Chloe's post, as you'll know if you're a long time reader, and every time she continues to smash it out of the park. One of her recent posts really stuck with me and got me thinking about my own perspective on read receipts. Should we keep read receipts on? I know that when I can't see if someone's read my message, it infuriates me - I hate the mystery and will actively choose to talk on a platform, Messenger I'm looking at you, that has read receipts enabled by default. However, then the obligation and guilt comes to haunt you. Read a message and forget to reply? The other person knows. And even worse, you could choose to read and not reply, sending a passive-aggressive signal to your texting buddy.

Ergh, I'm still not entirely sure how I feel about it all and if I could truly give up the read receipt, but Chloe sums up the issue wonderfully.

london days out | crossrail place roof garden

I'm making a conscious effort at the moment to get out and explore London as much as possible at the moment. Whether it be after work or at the weekend. I recently read Erica's post on the Crossrail Place Roof Garden and it looks like just the place I'd like to hang out in! I think I may have passed through here last year on my way to Big Easy, but didn't stop and look around. I must go back soon!
I'm just going to come out and say it. I love Love Island. I'm addicted. I don't care if you think it's rubbish, it's an hour a day where I can forget everything and become totally swept up in the lives of 8 or so islanders. I've been loving Vix Meldrew's daily catch up posts, and of course the endless scrolling through memes after each show. Do you watch the show?

The Prosecco Sessions

My lovely friend Pippa, who writes regularly on her blog Clashing Time currently co-hosts a podcast called The Prosecco Sessions, and this week I got a cheeky lil mention on the show! I'd highly recommend this podcast, it's like listening to your best friends having a good old natter over a glass of bubbly. Don't be fooled though, the girls cover some serious topics we all face in the land of adulthood. Not one to be missed!

The Debrief Podcast

As I mentioned earlier, I am a little bit (very much so) addicted to old episodes of The Debrief Podcast. Yep, I was totally living under a rock seemingly last year when the show kicked off, and now it's stopped! RIP The Debrief. The Debrief Podcast is hosted by Tessa Coates and Stevie Martin, who I both adore and will proudly admit they make me laugh every time I listen. I'm listening to the entire archives before I let myself listen to their new adventure, Nobody Panic. The show looks at a different topic each week, centered around learning how to be an adult and live better. It's certainly helped me get my groove on!

The Multi-Hyphen Method

I've finally picked up again, and what better way to get back into reading than with Emma Gannon's latest book, The Multi-Hyphen Method. I'm around halfway through this book (likely much further by the time you read this) and am loving it! The whole idea of being at work and having to do the 9-5 thing seems so old-fashioned. I want greater work flexibility and I think we should all strive for that! Emma discusses how and why this should be the way forward in the workplace. It's also been great reading a real-life physical book on my train home every day. Even if it's just for ten minutes or so, that's ten minutes of quality not-looking-at-my-phone time.
Guess where I've been going to? The gym, that's right! After being unable to hold down a regular routine in what feels like months and months and months (and honestly I think it was November when I last went 'regularly') I've finally got it together and started going at least twice a week again. My aim is three times, but if I only manage twice, I think that's pretty good going. I'm planning on using Love Island as a reward. I go to the gym, I can watch Love Island. I don't, I have to wait.

And finally, last week I went to see James Veitch at Angel Comedy Club with a few of my friends. I've seen James' a few times now and every time he just gets funnier! My cheeks hurt for a long time afterward and I'm pretty sure I've got abs on the way after laughing so much. I even got to have a quick chat and photo with James after the show! Much fun was had!

Becoming Who I Want To Be

Right. Time to be real here.

Last May I started broadening my horizons and listening to podcasts which completely transformed my outlook on the industry. I had so much motivation, I actively blogged, I actively worked to better myself, and at the time and looking back, I am bloody proud of myself.

Since then, I've seen glimpses of myself in that mindset, but I think, honestly, I'm lazy. I'll go through phases of being on it, and phases of not blogging for months at a time.

What have I noticed? Those periods of time where I'm 'on it' I look back on fondly and feel like I've achieved something. Everything else? Meh. It's all right but I was just coasting along. Coasting is not good.

Time to change!

Here's my action plan;

  • Listen to podcasts that provoke creative thoughts, encourage self-care & self-improvement, and make me laugh. Including; 
    • Ctrl Alt Delete
    • Keeping it Candid
    • My Favorite Murder
    • The Debrief Podcast / Nobody Panic
    • The Fringe Of It
  • Read books! I've got an ever-growing tower of books which are just sitting there, not being read. I want to read for at least 10 every day. 
  • Get up earlier and do yoga. I want to do it - so why don't I get up and, you know, do it?
  • Go to the gym three times a week. I feel excellent afterward, so again, why on earth don't I just do it?
  • Walk more - if I've got the time and a trip will take me less than half an hour to walk, walk it. 
  • Document this 'journey'. 

Perhaps this lack of enthusiasm, mixed with anxiety bubbling under the surface, and a general feeling of not knowing what I want to do next week let alone what my grand plan for the future is, is one of the reasons why I've felt a little lost when it comes to blogging.

So, here begins my 'journey' of actually sitting down and getting some blog posts written up about things I already talk about (Pillow Talk and bullet journal posts, I'm looking at you) as well as regular snippets here on the blog or on Instagram updating you, dear reader, on my progress of leveling up. Becoming who I want to be.

Time to begin.

Does Made In Chelsea Promote Toxic Relationships?

Made In Chelsea. The show I love to hate...

Last weekend I was feeling absolutely knackered, so decided to binge on a show that I haven’t watched since my late teens. I was catching up on old episodes (we’re talking series 10/11) of Made in Chelsea.

As I watched, I started to remember why I’d stopped watching.

In case you're unaware, Made in Chelsea is a reality show based in, you guessed it, Chelsea, where we see the lives of young socialites living it up in capital (or occasionally a luxury hot destination - v. jealous) and all the drama that comes with it.

As I sat there wrapped in up in a duvet watching too many episodes than I'd like to admit, I realised that the whole show centres around drama. It's just argument after argument.

The storylines are always based on one of the following: either a friendship group is on the verge of breaking up thanks to a comment said behind someone's back, or a missed party invite. Let's be clear, there are worse things to worry about in the world than not getting invited to a party.

The other thing is relationships. It seems like everyone and their best friend's mother sticks their nose in (Hint: Don't, it's none of your business), there's cheating left, right and centre, or there's being made to feel like utter shit for going out with your friends on a night out instead of staying in with your significant other. Newsflash people, going out to a social event without your boyfriend/girlfriend is not a crime. Don't even get me started on the scenarios where one party in the relationship is guilt tripping the other into picking them or their friends. Not on!

Anyway, yes, I know that this is a reality TV show so of course, it's going to be dramatic, the situations are often set up and made into an elaborate string of dialogue as we switch between various cliques talking about each other behind each other's back. But it's all too easy to get swept up in this Instagram worthy world, coated in an all too perfect filter oozing in aesthetic.

The more I watched, the more I wondered how watching this show regularly might skew my view of the world, and make me treat my own friendships and relationship differently.

The show manages to create a very toxic atmosphere, and yet portray it as normal. It becomes normal to bitch on your bestie. It becomes normal to stick with a manipulative boyfriend, it becomes normal to create drama over absolutely everything!

That and the fact I also sat for a long while contemplating why my current daily routine doesn't involve going for elevensies every day and having fancy tea and cake.

What I think I'm trying to say is, often in this Instagram orientated world, it can be hard to see the difference between what's real and what's not. We're surrounded by this vision of supposed perfection online, not seeing the truth, and Made In Chelsea is an example of a somewhat toxic lifestyle, glamourised and made to look like #goals for us all to drool over.

Don't get me wrong, I love a reality TV show and can't quite tear myself away from watching at the moment, but remember to take what you watch and see online with a pinch of salt.